two uteri, two mamas pregnant, AGAIN, with baby number two

the, um, panic February 18, 2008

Filed under: ttc — charlotte @ 9:20 pm

as we approach a seemingly absurd week of pregnancy, week THIRTY, i am beginning to panic. i’m starting to think about the woman in my birthclass for Smarty who did not come to our birthclass reunion because her baby died in utero at 38 weeks for no reason. she had to give birth anyway. i’m starting to feel nauseated when i think about all our bills and how messy our house is and how totally unprepared it is for a baby who will probably weight about 7 pounds and who needs 94 pounds of gear. i’m remembering, just kinda, what long term sleep deprivation feels like and it ain’t pretty. i’m remembering how i only get 3 weeks off with this baby, 1 week sick pay, 1 week vacation, and 1 unpaid week. that is all i get because i’m not the freakin birth mom.

it is scary being so close to having something i so desperately want.


8 Responses to “the, um, panic”

  1. Calliope Says:

    week 30! WOW!
    Been thinking of you guys and dear little Carol.

  2. shelli Says:

    heh – to quote Malka: “Cali, You funny!” 😉

    C-can you take more with FMLA? With Malka, I was allowed to take up to 12 weeks, but I only took 8, because that’s all we could afford without salary… Or are you still too new on the job to have accumulated any time?

    And Mazal Tov on 30 weeks!

  3. Congrats on 30 weeks –
    and yes, it will be a force of nature that you will find unbearable at time –
    unbearably difficult and unbearably in love until it hurts.

    I am excited for you and wish you the best –

  4. mrsbluemont Says:

    congrats on 30 weeks. i hope everything in the next two handful of weeks goes smoothly, peacefully, and that even under the weight of it all, you find bliss in this last stretch. oxxo

  5. complicatedmama Says:

    holy fucking crap, you’re havin’ a baby.

  6. mommytoo Says:

    i just had to comment because i recently said almost the same thing on my blog — that it’s really scary to have my dreams come true. congratulations on everything!

  7. Kathy Says:

    If you waited until you were prepared to have a baby you would never have one. Congrats on the 30 weeks! It took us 3 years, 1 miscarriage and $10,000 to finally get pregnant and then we were scared the whole time of losing her. Our daughter will be 2 next month, it goes by so fast. Good luck!

  8. byrdlady Says:

    Totally natural panic, i’m sure! You guys are gonna be fine…and i am so happy this is nearing birth-day. 🙂

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