Thanks for all your concern and info. I am in data mode, which helps me deal with the whole “we-might-loose-the-baby-again” nightmare.
I am not concerned so much with the heart rate or the embryo size anymore. My main issue is with the small measuring sac (it is not actually measuring that small) and the oddly shaped sac. If you know anything more about the sac shape thing, good or bad, or if you have any more comments about our ultrasound pics, please, please share.
One consolation I happened upon today was an incredible, and I mean INCREDIBLE, and by incredible I mean ultra fancy and very fucking satisfying cal.culator which tells you average CR.L (crow.n to ru.mp le.gth), heart rate, getatio.nal sac, hcg, and more. The dreamiest part? It is an excell spreadsheet and lets you adjust dates, calculate by F.ET, hcG sh.ot date, ovul.ation date, etc, and then you can look at what the data should be for how many weeks and days you are or WILL BE. I swear to motherfucking god this is the most satisfying spreadsheet I have ever used. EVER. And the numbers seem to jive with other sources, although all numbers and calculators differ somewhat. But I’m telling you, people, I have never seen something like this before. Check it fucking out.
The other thing I am deciding to do (yes, just to make me feel better) is change our due date to May 2nd. We have been counting conception date as August 9th, because she gave herself the shot the day before that, but truly she probably did not ovulate until the middle of the night that night, maybe even the morning, which would really be August 10th, which means that at the ultrasound we were only 6w3d, which means that the sac (according to my new fancy calculator) was exactly the right size and the embryo was only measuring 1 day behind. The heart rate was perfect. Now the only unresolved issue is the sac shape. Fuck. Oh and the fact that the baby could die at any moment even if all looks good. Fuck that.
Even if everything goes well next week, we will only be at 7w3d…there are so.many.fucking.hurdles. Have I said fuck enough? Fuck.
Please share sac shape knowledge.
Badly shaped sacs=miscarriage. So we’ll wait to see what happens on motherfucking MONDAY. Can you believe we must wait that long?
I am feeling very sorry for myself today as I am: 1. sick as a dog, 2. taking care of a toddler, 3. researching depressing dead baby shit, 4. silently whispering pleasebeokpleasebeokpleasebeok while trying not to cry, 5. convincing myself that it is over or will be very soon.
The ugly and confusing ultrasound is all too familiar. Fucking fuck.