I heart New York. I heart my fellow bloggers. I heart taking a break from my family.
I have been trying to formulate a smart, sassy post that expresses what my weekend was like…but I can’t muster it. I’m too tired, and I’m still trying to process everything. If you don’t already know, a bunch of us lesbians, bisexuals, straights, marrieds, singles, and everything in betweens who are trying to have babies, have had babies, or want more babies had a shindig on Saturday night in New York City.
Friday night I spent with Co and Lo (thank you very much ladies!). The other two nights I spent with Bri and Wes. I had already met Lo and Co briefly, but everyone else was (were?) strangers. Strangers I knew intimately, but through writing only. It is different to look into eyes. To see smiles and expressions and bodies. Meeting everyone on Saturday was surreal and fabulous.
I did not get to talk to many of you as much as I would have liked. I wrote a whole section about the various things I loved (Trista, I needed another 3 days of solid talking with you) and what I was surprised by, and what I was impressed by, but I just erased it because it was incomplete and sounded like I was writing to you all in a yearbook. So just know how much I adore you.
Others, like Cali and Bri I spent hours and hours with talking and crying. I mean really people. I am a therapist, and I was still shocked by the amount of talking I did over the weekend. Shocked.
I spent the most time with Bri and she asked for feedback in her blog, so here is a paragraph about her (yes I know how you love people to say nice things about you!). I am in love with her whole family. GMB is so articulate and adorable. I would have had a crush on him when I was 16. Gertie, the chihuahua, bit me. Apparently when she sits in your lap, cuddles up, and looks at you adoringly you should not do what you think you should do (petting) or you get bit. Silly me. Lexi, the gorgeous whippet mix wanted nothing to do with me, as I am not elegant enough for her. The cats were adorable. The apartment, well, I felt like I was at a suite at The W Hotel. Nice taste people. As for Wes, I am madly in love with him. Kudos to him for putting up with A LOT of girly chatter about vajayjays and cervical fluid. And Bri is exactly as she is in her blog except that IRL she is not all spit fiery, but rather nice and warm. She is funny and smart. What can I say. And just when I thought I couldn’t love her more, we discovered we both hate the phone and agreed never ever to call each other.
I am completely in love with New York City. I had some great white pizza and an epic walk through Central Park. Beautiful leaves, crisp air, blue skies. I fell in love with the city.
Oh, and I was alone. No LM, no S. I barely missed them. I reconnected with the non-mom part of me in a way that I have not done since three years ago, before I was pregnant.
I exsist without my baby, without my wife! I am a whole entire person independent from them.
Lastly I want to thank all of the bloggers I met. I have a friend who really snubs the whole idea of blogging. Actually it’s PPKD (yeah you should like him even less now). Anyway, there are many people who feel this way. Like we are not real friends because we know each other online. Although that was never true, something did shift this weekend. We hugged and talked. We became more real to each other. I can hear you and see you now when I read your blogs.
I think many of us solidified our relationships. Maybe they will now extend beyond TTC and into the rest of our lives. Maybe we will tell our grand kids (yes we all have to have lots of those after all the shit we’ve been through) how we met for the first time way back in 2006 when some of them were young and some of them were yet to be. Maybe someday our kids will talk amongst themselves about how crazy we all are.
I feel much more deeply invested now in all of you and your families. I feel stronger.
Thank you a million times for being so authentic and kind. Thank you a billion times for accepting me. I want to know what you thought of the whole thing, of meeting me, of meeting each other!
Just an actual TTC update:
S is not pregnant, again.
For sure, again.