Ignore the date of this post, I just needed to post the email in a placeholder on the blog.
This IS shutting both of us out (we are writing this together as it affects us both). And it is making all of us, Charlotte, your husband, S and LM pay for your mistakes. Before your most recent mistake, we were all moving on and feeling way better. A natural separation had already happened and if we hadn’t had to cancel the camping trip after the revelation of your breach of trust, we would have made even more progress in normalizing all of our relationships. How you come to the decision that a complete break is the best idea is beyond us. You and FPKD were already focusing on each other. With this decision, you’re just further damaging your relationship with us.
Prior to your last email, we would have been happy for us as a group to decide to take some clear amount of time off, probably just not doing dinners for a few weeks would have felt good to everyone, but this pattern where you decide for all of us to sever ties indefinately feels really terrible. You did this before in [the State you were living in a few months ago] with crappy consequences…most notably, we had no idea how shitty you felt about the whole donor thing so we didn’t call it off.
The unpleasant traits that are coming out are undoubtedly less due to your relationship with us than to the fact that you have had such an emotionally devastating separation from your husband, are faced with giant upsetting baby emotions that you have never experienced before, surprised yourself with your huge resistance to donating and FPKD’s grief about it, among other issues.
Cutting off all contact, on your terms, isn’t about being a good friend to us. Since you didn’t specify ANY timeframe, we have to assume this means we will have nothing to do with helping you guys move into your new home and you will have nothing to do with finding out if we’re pregnant or not…and that’s just sad and not the sort of thing one can easily repair not being a part of.
S and Charlotte