The sperm bank was INCREDIBLE. Yes, ladies. We had a fabulous time. Frozen sperm is officially on the table (not literally of course, yet.)
They were sooooooo nice, accommodating, understanding. The woman we had a consultation with was a lesbian. The place is the only non-profit sperm bank in the country. The consultant had met all of the donors who were our favs.
She told us her impressions, very precise details about what they look like (comments such as, I don’t really go for hunky/jock types, but if you do he is fabulous, or he has a big smile that reaches his eyes, oval face, his eyes are not as deeply set as yours, Charlotte, but he has a very similar strong jaw line, or his eyebrows are thick, but not a unibrow.) Detail upon detail.
She even went to peruse the donor photographs (I was dying for an invisibility potion so I could follow her and see for myself) to see if anyone we had not chosen bore a particular resemblance to me. She talked to us about their personalities, her gut impressions. Sometimes she said she did not particularly connect with a donor, or that they ‘danced to their own drummer’ which I took as a bad sign from the way she said it.
So the frozen sperm is a viable option for us. We took home 3 long profiles, with tons of details. We feel like the frozen sperm is now a great choice, not the shitty left over choice if our PKD’s don’t work out. This actually makes the decision harder, but feels relieving. The donors all have some of my characteristics, personality traits etc.
So Valentines Day at the sperm bank was a success.
We had not really thought about what it would be like to turn down our PKDs. Especially PKD #1. He is really looking forward to helping us make a baby, and meeting his genetic baby. He just feels too involved, wants his own kids too badly, wants the kid to meet his parents (even though he’ll sign a document saying that we have the option not to have such a meeting).
Thankfully I have foisted the responsibility for this onto S. I have told her that because I do most of the sperm research and blogging, and making of appointments, and FILLING IN HER CHART, she must do the dirty deed of saying no, if we ultimately decide that.
We meet with the Fireman and family on Thursday. Feels like we have sperm coming out the wazoo.